After the staycation

LifeME/CFS

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You know the post-holiday blues? Turns out it is entirely possible to still get those, even when you didn’t leave town on your holiday. Going back to work after my staycation has been quite rough. With the budget last week (I stayed up late updating the Australian Aid Tracker), which also happened to fall on my birthday, it only took a couple of days to feel exhausted again after my week off. And the temperature dropped sharply too, leaving me aching and exhausted.

Beautiful Australian natives #cbr #cbrfarmersmarket #flowers (staycation flashback)

A photo posted by Ashlee Betteridge (@ashbetteridge) on

It was also just a bit disheartening to go back to the same-same after having the energy to do more enjoyable-life things (i.e. going to the farmers’ market, above). On my week off, I had space to convince myself that I was going to try to make things better for myself, that I was going to plan how I could still move forward somehow despite the illness. But then to come back to the grind, back to being exhausted, and to be flung back into a situation where I feel I don’t have wiggle room to get what I want (or where others seem unwilling to make changes that would help me have more of that)… it was pretty demoralising. I am also just losing my patience with a lot of things that I’ve tried to fix time and time again, and am feeling undervalued. And it was disappointing to realise that the ‘sort-of-refreshed’ feeling I got from staycation only lasted as long as I wasn’t busy.


As I consequence, I didn’t really do anything for my birthday. I just didn’t really feel like it. But I had taken a bit of a ‘treat yo’ self’ attitude during my staycation, so I guess that counts (my credit card sinkhole certainly felt it).

And there was cake at work with my colleagues, so that was nice. But at the moment, part of me wants to just go on a staycation until I feel like a normal human again.

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