The banana protector


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My mother likes to buy a lot of strange things from those Homewares catalogues that get delivered to your door in Oz. Whenever I go home, I am constantly finding strange implements around the house designed to perform random menial tasks that I never realised were hard or needed special devices to undertake. Basically, take some sort of obscure problem that society at large isn’t really impacted by, then imagine some sort of cheap plastic device invented to work around it.

This is her newest purchase: a banana protector.


Helpfully modeled by my little sister, my partner in cynicism (she was at a dance comp, she doesn’t normally wear that crazy makeup)!  Basically, you put your banana inside it.  It’s a plastic tube that is supposed to stop your banana from getting bruised and mushy.  According to my mum, it works wonders for putting bananas inside handbags, schoolbags…. her list stopped there.  “It helps them stay nice, Ashlee,” she said, exasperated at my fits of giggles.  “Anyway, it was only cheap.”

My questions about an exact price remained unanswered, though I believe through reading her eyebrow raises, and her telling off my sister for eye rolling and raising her eyebrows in an “up up” gesture during our little game of Price is Right, that it probably came in somewhere between $7.99 and $11.99.


I asked if all bananas fitted in it… mum said some needed to be bent.  I asked if bending it to fit it in the protector sometimes bruised the banana, hence rendering the initial purpose of the product to be null and void.  She declined to comment, and proceeded to rant about how I am too cynical. :p

3 Responses to " The banana protector "

  1. rima fauzi says:

    moms are like that. mine is too.

    btw, when i saw ‘banana protector’ my mind went elsewhere.. then i saw your pic (you are lovely btw) and saw that thingie, i realised that i ought to go out and try to be more normal.
    *while chanting “banana is a fruit. banana is a fruit. banana is a fruit”

  2. rima fauzi says:

    oopss.. it’s ur sister who is in the pic.. my bad..
    she is lovely, be sure to tell her i said so. 🙂

  3. Ashlee says:

    Why thankyou, I will pass that on. Haha yes it’s hard to keep one’s mind out of the gutter with the phrase “banana protector”, that’s what makes the whole situation even more humorous!!